The Rules of Engagement

I became engaged on February 29th, 2009. I asked Jeff to marry me. He said yes.

If you didn't realize, that is a significant day for unmarried woman. It's a day when they are allowed to chase after unmarried men and propose to them. In the United States and Canada, it's know as Sadie Hawkins Day.

It all started in the 5th century, when St. Bridget was angry that women had to wait so long for men to propose. St. Patrick said, "What the heck. Desperate ladies can have this one day every four years so that they can propose the the man of their choice." In Scotland, a law was passed saying that women could ask for a gentleman's had in matrimony on this day. If a man refused, he was given a fine. Mind you, the fines weren't that severe. It could as strict as a kiss! In these enlightened times, we don't tend to look down upon a woman who proposes marriage to her significant other. Or do we?

I have never been a conventional person. One could say that I tend to march to the beat of a very different (but kick ass!) drummer. I sometimes enjoy turning an ideal on its head for re-examination. I like to make people scratch their heads and say, "Huh. I never expected her to do that." Right now, I have that reaction in abundance, some in a good way, some not so much.

Here are a few rules that have been passed along to me by people who shall remain nameless:

1. My engagement isn't real. Why? Because I asked him, not the other way around. Apparently, it's only official if the man pops the question. Where's this rule?


2. Because I do not sport a diamond ring that costs 3 months salary, my engagement is a sham. Excuse me?


3. The fact I do not sport a diamond ring at all, but instead a lovely silver ring, is a testament to the fact that my fiancee is "just not that into me". Um, he said yes. I'm pretty sure he's into me or he would have said no.


4. I paid for my own ring. Yes, I did! I'm not ashamed by this. Why should I be? If you have a good reason, let me know.


5. The idea I want to use my ring as my wedding ring (thus only having one ring) sends some people I know into a tizzy. There's no crime in only having one ring. It'll make it easier to keep track of it.

I didn't know there were rules. I didn't realize that getting a diamond ring was a prize after a long, complicated game. I didn't know I was supposed to win. The ring or the execution of a proposal is not the thing that matters. What matters is that the man I love is going to marry me.

What matters is that he said, "Yes, Anglia. I'd love to spend the rest of my life with you. I love you."

If that's not better than a diamond ring, I don't know what is. I think I'm a winner no matter what.